Watch Crazy Ex-Girlfriend

The cultural thing that has made me the happiest recently is the new TV series/ musical Crazy Ex-Girlfriend. I like it so much that I thought I would resurrect my moribund blog to praise it. And, hey, the star and show creator, Rachel Bloom, just won the Golden Globe last night for acting, so I know I am not alone in my love for the show. It is simultaneously silly and serious, broad and brainy.

If you love musicals, then absolutely and without fail watch it. It’s full of heart and very sharp. If you sometimes like musicals, I urge you to give it a chance as it’s totally original, very funny and also quite romantic in its own twisted way.

It’s about Rebecca, played by a woman of many talents named Rachel Bloom. (No matter what happens to this show, you will be reading that name again.) The character is a smart, Harvard-trained corporate lawyer who is unhappy and unfulfilled in her life in Manhattan. By happenstance, she runs into an old summer camp flame, Josh, who is retuning to his hometown of West Covina, California. She still carries a large torch for him, which is reignited upon their chance meeting. She makes the bold move to give up her very large six figure paycheck to move to where “Josh just happens to live,” as she oft repeats. This buoyant song sets up the situation beautifully (but my blog cuts off some of the right, and doesn't allow for full screen.  Better to watch them all here.):

I admit I was a little worried about the premise. Is this going to be a stalker musical? Is she going to continually make a fool of herself in a cringe-inducing way? While there are a some cringe-inducing moments - particularly in the earlier episodes - the answer is no. Our heroine is complicated, it is true. She is crazy in love - haven’t we all been there? - and she also seems to have some real problems with mood disorder: anxiety and some degree of manic/depressive issues. She was abandoned by her dad, her mom is overbearing, and she was a social misfit in school. However, she actually starts to blossom in West Covina even through doubts, fears and occasional depression. What starts as a seemingly crazy move is slowly, but surely, turning out to be a truly great decision. While chasing love, she is actually finding herself and her place in the world. 

This is the first musical I have ever seen in which women - and issues important to women - are at the center of the story. 

Now, if you are someone who loves musical parody but you are allergic to human emotion, perhaps you should stick with Trey Parker/Matt Stone’s musicals (South Park, Team America and Book of Mormon). Like in this show, Parker/Stone write parodies in different musical styles which are often very funny and musically great. But unlike Crazy Ex-Girlfriend, they essentially don’t give a damn about women or, for that matter, people. A good example is their “love” song, “The End of the Act,” from Team America. It’s a great tune, ostensibly about the love the man feels for a woman, but is really just a way to say nasty things about the director Michael Bay, the movie Pearl Harbor and the acting of Ben Affleck (all of whom richly deserved it!).  It’s funny, brilliant and perfect it its own way. But it says absolutely nothing about the character or love in general and barely furthered the plot – to the degree that Team American had a plot, which was quite limited.

Crazy Ex-Girlfriend’s musical numbers, on the other hand, always give insight into the characters and their conflicts, and are often crucial to understanding their fears, motivations and feelings. The songs are just as good musically and just as funny as the best of Parker/Stone, but with so much more insight into their characters, and the songs are brimming with wit and full of humanity in all its complexity. But don't get me wrong, while they deal in human emotions, they are not sentimental in any traditional sense. Many numbers are truly twisted. and as raunchy as the network allows. (Explicit versions of many of the numbers can be found on YouTube.)

And they manage to make a great musical weekly!! It truly is a miracle.

The show is stacked with great characters played by very talented singers and dancers. Primarily, there is Rebecca's best friend Paula, who becomes her accomplice in snagging Josh. Then there is the sarcastic grump, Greg, her sometime-suitor. There is her clueless but sweet boss, Darryl. And, in the most recent episode, we meet her overbearing Jewish mother in spectacular musical style: 



And, of course, Josh happens to be here. Each major character has had - through the first eight episodes - songs of their own to show their considerable chops. It is very hard to pick my favorite number from the show as they are all great in their own way. However this blogger - after only five shows - didn't have any reluctance to give the “Definitive Ranking” of all the songs to that point. 

If you don’t want to travel to YouTube land, then just check out a couple here:

For a perfect parody - and a fantastic song simultaneously - of old-time Astaire/Rogers type musicals, this is Greg’s proposition to Rebecca.

And here is a very funny, "inspiring" song from Paula to Rebecca. 

Since the children’s chorus responses are sometimes hard to hear, here are the lines from that portion:

Follow your dreams (Follow your dreams)

Stare at the sun (Stare at the sun)

Play in the street (A busy street)

If you’re scared of bees, (Scared of bees)

Get stung (Don’t have an EpiPen®‎ ready)

Reach for the stars (Literally touch the stars)

Face your fears (Stars aren’t that hot)

Face your fears (Face your fears)

Join the Marines (Join the Marines)

Swim right after eating (Don’t wait 30 minutes)

Cause you are amazing (So amazing)

Wipe back to front (Don’t wipe front to back)

Drop out of school (School is stupid)

And, though the holiday season is over, I am in love with their ode to "California Christmastime," and find myself humming it constantly.



You can catch up with the show here or on Hulu.  It returns January 25 on The CW.  

Before Crazy Ex-Girlfriend, Rachel had made a number of satirical YouTube videos, most famously - at least in geek circles - "Fuck Me, Ray Bradbury."  It's a catchy number.  You can see more of her videos at her website Rachel Does Stuff.

Update

I haven't written on this blog for a long time!  In terms of the tonsil cancer, all is well and there is no sign of it.

I have another blog just this year—2013—dedicated to the 200th anniversary of Richard Wagner's birth.  It's here.

Maybe I will be back here in 2014.

My tonsil cancer blog

It's here.

The tonsil cancer treatment is over so if you click that link, it's historical.  While my doctors will continue to track my progress and make sure that the cancer does not return, I will just post any news here in the future.  I prefer to have only one blog, but I wanted strangers with tonsil cancer to be able to find that one in case it might help them.

Life Lessons

You know, my blog is really stale. I haven't written in it for about a year. I wanted a new leading page. So, I decided to publish something that I sent a friend a long time ago. My life lessons, How audacious! Please write your own and share them. I can't, for the life of me, get it down to 5 as per this site.

Here they are:

1. Define success for yourself and strive to achieve what you believe to be success.
2. Make a plan based on what you want and follow it (or change it as circumstances change).
3. Live for today but plan for tomorrow,
4. Fear is THE limiting factor; learn to push pass your fears if you want to succeed.
5. Choices are faced every single minute—think about your choices.
6. Don’t look back and regret—look forward and plan.
7. Don’t dwell on shame or guilt, but pay attention to what caused it, and change what needs to be changed—let go of what doesn’t.
8. The best things in life really are free.
9. Embrace contradiction; celebrate paradox.
10. Art is a must. Music, particularly.
11. Admit your errors and apologize, promptly and sincerely, when you blow it.
12. Forgive people as fast and deeply as you can, then they will forgive you quickly and deeply, too; it is by forgiving that one is forgiven.
13. Laugh a lot, particularly at yourself.
14. Widen what is acceptable; embrace differences.
15. Be grateful.
16. Play.
17. Socialize—have friends. But, don’t just hang out with people like you (age, race, sexual orientation, religion, whatever...)—seek diversity within your friendship circles as much as possible.
18. Be generous with your time, your money, your skills. Help people.
19. Avoid (your particular) stressors.
20. Spend less than you earn, and invest the rest.
21. Exercise as it really helps anxiety and stress as well as general health.
22. Avoid jealousy, envy, resentment, and revenge whenever you can.
23. Embrace compassion, forgiveness, conciliation and reconciliation whenever you can.
24. Love way, way more than dislike or hate (if you do 22 and 23, this is inevitable.)
25. A life in balance is crucial for happiness.
26. Don’t worry if you are somewhat “crazy”—we all are to one degree or another—admit it and embrace it. (If you are more than "somewhat" crazy, seek help)
27. Do what you say you are going to do.
28. Respond promptly to everyone; be on time.
29. Thank people when they are nice to you.
30. Keep assumptions light, but use your brain—categories are necessary—be ready to be proven wrong.
31. Embrace every death as an urging to celebrate life.
32. Have empathy but not so much that you are paralyzed trying to rescue others while losing yourself.
33. Be nice to people, but—come on—some sarcasm is also necessary for mental health.
34. A fall from grace can be the best thing that happens to you. When you really screw up, the chance for real growth comes. (Good luck, Tiger)
35. No risk, no reward
36. A great partner is wonderful; it is better to be alone than with a bad partner
37. If you have a partner in life, develop a combination of independence and interdependence. Absolutely, do not be jealous, controlling, and possessive—no matter what—as it is impossible to have a successful relationship with these qualities. If your partner is not worthy of trust, then leave her or him. Otherwise, you must trust.
38. What works in this society, won’t necessarily work in another—truths are often culturally created. This is an USA “blue state” list, for the record.
39. This too shall pass. Life flows and intense pain or intense pleasure are, generally, fleeting.
40. Be persistent. That is the essence of problem-solving.

In general, I would say I really have a handle on the first 40 and they all come from my life experience, and I follow them as best as I can. The last three are still far from my grasp, but I might get there:

41. Know when to hold ‘em, know when to fold ‘em, know when to walk away, know when to run. (Kenny Rogers – from the song, The Gambler.) Seriously, this is really easier said than done. However, you should strive for all these things.
42. Moderation in everything. (I don’t do this one at all, but I am convinced it would be good if I did!)
43. Stop and smell the roses.

My love blog to West Cliff (and Angela)

When I retired a couple of years ago, I made a list of 50 things I wanted to do in retirement. Number 15 was to bike to West Cliff daily to enjoy our magnificent coastline while getting some exercise. I envisioned riding up and down the coast, stopping to watch my beloved pelicans or the surfers or the breaking waves whenever the mood struck. Lots of people walk up and down, but that just seemed like too much work. I am a bit on the lazy side, but realized I needed to do something in retirement to stay fit. The bike-on-West Cliff idea was bare minimum, I knew, but it was, at least, something.

Well, it didn’t really happen as I envisioned because I met a remarkable woman, Angela, who coaxed me to give the walk on West Cliff a whirl. Her speed is just shy of the road runner, but she glides as if this is a normal speed. She walked as I jogged alongside her. With more encouragement on Angela’s part, I continued doing it until I got to my present condition: I can almost keep up with her by walking, throwing in a skip here and there. However, she does takes pity on me and slows down a bit, though she pretends that is not the case. (And, I think she hopes I will continue to improve to her road runner speed...not likely!)

Nonetheless, now I am totally hooked. Sometimes I walk with Angela at maximum speed; sometimes I walk by myself at a rapid – but slower – speed while listening to Leslie’s iPod (inevitably Wagner); sometimes I walk with Leslie at a relatively slower pace. (She rides her bike for exercise so she enjoys a more leisurely stroll.) But, always, I have this feeling of peace and, on many days, almost perfection.

I am pretty sure that if I continue this I will be healthier, happier and, most likely, live longer. All because of Angela's coaxing! May you have someone like Angela in your life.

So, let’s take a stroll with Angela, shall we??

We meet at her daughter’s school, Gateway, after she drops her off.
(Note the Obama sticker – Angela and I met working on the Obama campaign.)

This is located right by our iconic surfer’s statue.
From this point to Natural Bridges, it is about 2 miles, so our round trip will be about 4 miles.

I ride over on my bike to meet her.

We head off past the Lighthouse, catching a view of the surfers of the day. November has been a great month – most of the days, the surf has been up; the weather has been warm; everybody has been so damn happy along West Cliff.

We run into Angela’s friends every time we walk. She seems to know everyone! Always, she has some plan she needs to confirm or a reminder to deliver to whoever it is we have randomly bumped into. “Don’t forget the hospice benefit on Thursday!” or “You'll be at the State Parks fundraiser Saturday, right?” or “See you at the Board meeting tomorrow”.

Occasionally, I will run into someone I know – for instance, that is Janet on the right. She is in Leslie’s chorus.

Sometimes, it is a Leslie-bike day and she swings by.

I love looking at the beautiful, peaceful small beaches along the way.

And, of course, the crashing surf.

With the exception of some warm weekends, the path is not too full.
Somehow bikes, dogs, baby strollers, walkers, runners and the occasional rollerblader all fit.

Here is a picture of my favorite dog/person couple who walks everyday. That is Peter and Arrow. Arrow is a great dog – just walks along minding its own business. But, if you say hi to him, he immediately jumps with joy. Peter doesn't jump, but he is very nice, too. Arrow is so lucky to have Peter and, I am quite sure, visa versa.

This dog used to love the walk on West Cliff, but now is too arthritic for the effort.
So, her mom takes her in the wagon now.

Along the way, you will see the inevitable hippie with a guitar on one of the cliffs.

This is the parking lot in which the stoner /drumming families lived for years out of their beat-up vehicles. They are painting the curb to change it to 20-minute parking, preventing the group from planting there. I don’t know where they all went...So, it worked. I feel mixed about it.

Love to see all the birds along the way. Particularly the pelicans. I can’t get enough of pelicans!

When we reach the end at Natural Bridges, there is the ceremonial touching of the sign before the return trip.

Sometimes, we start at this end. If so, this is the spot I warm up.

After our stroll, I sometimes bike back up West Cliff and down Swift so that I can stop by my old job to say hi to whomever is working that day. I don’t miss the job; do miss the people.

Here are Orin and Adrian hard at work. Kinda...

And, then, back home...

My aloha dream

I think other people’s dreams are pretty boring. If they show up in a book, I skim the passage. If someone tells me his or her dream, I usually don’t listen closely (sorry, I’m an ass!) If it is a dream sequence in a movie, I am usually annoyed.

So, let me tell you my dream last night. It started as a general anxiety dream – I was running down a road to my parent’s house, as I had no car. I had to get to the airport to fly to Hawai’i but it looked like I would be late. I barely made the plane and I realized that I hadn’t brought luggage; I hadn’t arranged a place to sleep; no one knew I was coming. As I entered the plane, the stewardess said that if I wanted a drink, I had to give her cash right then. I didn’t have any cash, though I had a credit card. She wouldn’t take it.

So, yep, I was in a full-blown anxiety dream.

But, then, I said to myself – well I have a lot of clothes at our house on Alae. I could buy a bag at the Salvation Army for next to nothing. John and Jessica, our tenants, would surely let me take the car back early. Bud would put me up. Or Dick and Carol. Or Casey and Bill. (Edit - learn about these wonderful folks here.) When I arrived in Hilo, I called Bud and he said come on over. He fed me a cocktail and said I could stay as long as I liked. I called Jessica (who I had never met) and she insisted that I come over for breakfast the next morning and said I was welcome to stay with them, too. I let all my other friends know I was in town and they all said that I simply must stay at their respective homes sometime. All my anxiety melted away.

So, turns out that anxiety is just no match for aloha.

A few words about Dean

I went to a BBQ to celebrate the life of my buddy, Dean, today.

Dean was the kind of guy who could be dropped at any party in America – blue state or red state – and everybody would be totally comfortable with him. He just fit it. He was such a charmer –with a twinkle in his eye along with a winning grin and chuckle that promised gentle mischief. He was just so easy to be around.

But, through forces beyond his ability to control, several years ago the sparkle left his eyes; he no longer really laughed. He died much too young, in way too much pain. He lost the ability to really be what he most desperately wanted to be: a loving husband to his wife and a secure and devoted father to his two wonderful daughters. The biggest tragedy is that his descent happened before his daughters were really old enough to know the man he was underneath, and before, his pain and sorrow; the man that we were celebrating today.

All I can say to his daughters is that the Dean that I knew was a very good man bursting with true zest for life. And, he loved you two so much. I hope that the celebration today gave you a sense of how much he was loved and appreciated by everybody who knew him. He was one of a kind, very special and very, very good company.